The Forbidden Chapters Part 1: Afterlife Saga Page 5
Could it be possible…could Draven like me? But if that was the case then what had caused the ice-cold treatment only earlier tonight…what could have changed?
“Keira?” He said my name with concern and I looked around one last time just in case I would never see it again. Because I knew that now was not the time for this. I mean, there was never a good time for an internal meltdown because of how much you were falling in love with your boss. Not when he showed you the slightest bit of attention back. So, I shook it from my mind and nodded before joining him. But now Draven was looking at me as though he had heard my inner turmoil, or more embarrassingly, the part when I admitted to myself that I was falling in love with him. Now I could only pray to every God out there that I hadn’t unknowingly said it aloud.
“Did I…?” I started to ask because seriously, the more I looked at his face, the more I convinced myself that I had said the unthinkable.
“I think it wise we get back to the club now.” Was all he said in a stern voice and I felt the harsh tone of it crush me. So much for my theory I thought as I nodded and walked past him down the long hallway, tensing when I heard the door slam behind me.
We walked in silence and the second we made it through the doors at the end everything changed. It was as if we had stepped through a different portal and the second we did, we lost the magic that had started to connect us together. But now we were back in the real world and lines were clearly drawn. A switch had been flipped and the Draven I had encountered was long gone, I knew that with just a look. So, I wasn’t surprised when he said,
“I think it best if we forgo that drink. Your shift ended fifteen minutes ago and Frank will be waiting for you.” I closed my eyes and nodded without him seeing the pain cross my features. Then I plastered on my fake face for the first time since being here and presented him with a part of me I thought I had left at home…back in England…back in my private Hell.
“I think that is for the best. After all, we wouldn’t want to give anyone any reason to gossip, your reputation if far too important to darken it by getting too personal with… your staff.” I said giving him a smile that never reached my eyes let alone the sound of my voice.
“Keira that is…”
“Good night Mr Draven… Sir,” I said interrupting him and then I turned my back on him. I walked into the small room to retrieve my bag and jacket before I walked out of there with more purpose than ever before. I briefly noticed that Draven was now back at the seat of his domain and poor Sophia looked so confused to see me storming out, she made a move to get up when Draven stopped her.
“Let her go,” he snapped and then downed his next drink with just as much purpose as I had donein getting out of there. So, Sophia stayed put and I was glad for it. I wasn’t exactly in the mood to hear any more excuses for her brother’s favourite type of behaviour backlash. I mean Jesus, it was like walking on eggshells before getting on a rollercoaster named Afterlife…one being operated by Draven!
I stormed down the stairs and for the first time since I first walked through those doors to Afterlife I was desperate to get out of there. I practically ran through the busy club and hated myself even more when I looked back to the VIP. What I saw there just added to the confusion that was Draven as I saw him stood there in shadows, looking down and watching me flee from his club. I hated that he knew how much he had obviously upset me just through my sudden actions. I wished I didn’t care. I wished I had it in me not to even look back at him but more than anything else, I wished I had it in me not to shed the tears that were now rolling down my cheeks.
I pushed my way out of the front doors in an unintended dramatic exit, ignoring Jo as he tried to ask me if I was alright. I was just glad that Frank was late and even though I had been warned by Mr Almighty himself not to be out here alone, right now Draven could shove his concern up his ass!
I ran out of sight and growled in frustration. Both angry with myself and the man who had played with my emotions this way. I just didn’t get it. Why act that way and then change so suddenly? I thought back to what I could have done wrong. What I had said I couldn’t remember, but it was only how I had felt inside that had slipped through the net. But that was something I was sure I had only thought, not said aloud. Although he had certainly acted as if it had been heard.
Well I had been a damn fool for thinking something in him had changed towards me. Maybe this had all just been a game to him and suddenly he realised he was the only one playing. Maybe then he decided to cut me some slack and make me realise it wasn’t real. Just a brother being nice to some shy little waitress for Sophia’s benefit…because she asked him to?
“Oh God, Kazzy, you’re stupid, stupid!” I said to myself as the realisation just hit me. That must have been it! It was just too shameful to bear. Well, tomorrow at class Sophia would need a good speaking too, no matter how much she had thought she was doing me a favour. I would have to tell her that I could no longer work the VIP and that I thought it best to keep as much distance between me and her brother in the future. This was perhaps a good thing. After all, my obsession with Draven was getting out of hand. I mean I was falling in love with him for Christ sake! Dreaming of him every night, thinking about him every day and then having to see him as someone completely different in the evenings at Afterlife. It was messing with my head and I knew more than most how dangerous that was.
I grabbed my head with both hands in a ridiculous attempt at trying to grip on to reality when I felt someone watching me. I looked around and saw nobody…or should I say, no-one with a body because what I did see was a great black bird sat high on the VIP’s balcony balustrades. It was watching me in such a way it was either keeping watch over me or that it could actually be believed it felt my pain and knew of my struggles.
It was at this point that I heard a car coming through the green tunnel of trees. I looked that way to see Frank’s car pulling up and when I looked back to the bird…
It was gone, like I was.
AUTHOR INSIGHT.
Chapter 24- Book 1
These next few chapters follow on from the ones before and therefore I made another heart-breaking decision to cut them as I also couldn’t add these to the original copy, as they wouldn’t have made sense. Besides, I think in the end I decided it was too soon for our lovers to come together this way and knew that it would have made my plans for the story very difficult to write if I continued down this path.
It also felt wrong for Keira to see Draven in his true form for the first time in what she believes to be a dream. I knew that I wanted to make more of an impact with this crucial moment in their lives and felt that the beginning of this next chapter didn’t cut it. Also, the first kiss they shared didn’t feel right under such a volatile reaction from Draven, no matter how sexy Draven dominating the page can be. And as for the second, well, in the end it also didn’t feel ‘right’.
But none of that can still take away that in these next few chapters, we see a side to Draven that is almost human. Even vulnerable in a way, when he sees Keira again. And I liked that once more Sophia played a hand in getting them together.
So here it is…technically, their first date…
Chapter 24
Dream Situations
Book 1
NEW
I woke with a start early the next morning after once again dreaming of Draven. Seriously would I ever learn? It felt as though my mind was betraying my heart and stabbing it in the back every time I thought of him. And this time was even worse as it felt like he had come to me in my dreams out of guilt for his treatment of me. The darker element to the dream I couldn’t account for though as it had been a first. I had dreamt that I had awakened to find him in my room, stroking back my hair and wiping away the invisible lines my tears had made but long ago dried up.
“I hate seeing you cry,” he told me softly and I sighed before replying,
“I hate it when you make me cry.” He winced and swallowed hard as I had done so m
any times when around him.
“I deserved that,” he admitted.
“I don’t understand why…why do I keep doing this to myself?” I told him knowing none of this was real and hating just how real it felt.
“Why you keep dreaming of me you mean?” He wanted to clarify, which I did with a nod.
“Only you can answer that,” he told me softly and I tore my eyes from his, feeling ashamed of myself and not wanting him to see my disgust.
“Does it hurt you to dream of me?” he asked in such a way that he could do something about it and it wasn’t my own sickness.
“It hurts that I enjoy it so much when in real life, it is nothing like how I picture being with you is in my mind,” I told him, feeling like this was the weirdest form of therapy I had ever encountered. It was a twisted dream I believed in and I wanted to make the smoke and mirrors disappear. I was sick and tired of living in the shadows of his world and tonight I had finally got a glimpse of what it was like with his spotlight being shone my way. But then he had cut that light with no explanation and worst of all, no warning so that I could arm myself with my barriers. No, he had torn them down and made me trust in his soft words, his gentle teasing, and his tender touch.
He had made me vulnerable and then crushed me by taking advantage of my trust.
“I am sorry you feel this way,” he told me and I shrugged my shoulders and gave him a small smile in return.
“It’s not like you’re real so what does it matter. The person who owes me that apology will never say it in real life, so it means nothing as it is coming from the subconscious part of my brain that is wishing her life away on a fantasy,” I told him and hearing this my dream Draven seemed to get angry. He got up from the bed and walked over to the window, one that was open. It was always strange how my mind conjured up a plausible way for him to get in here, even though he was just a figment of my imagination…like a handsome ghost conjured up by my daily memories of him.
“And here I am wishing my life away trying to convince myself this is for the best. That I am saving you the physical hurt when all I end up doing is inflicting the emotional kind. I see that you are as tortured as I and keeping you at arm’s length is almost as painful as keeping you close,” he told me cryptically and with so much sincerity that I could almost believe that the man in front of me now was the real Draven.
“Then the answer is simple.” He turned back to face me and I continued,
“You must choose which one hurts less for I know the answer to my own. Trust me when I say the emotional pain is far worse as I have already experienced my fair share of physical pain in my life but it is not my choice…it never was,” I told him knowing that doing so was practically pointless but speaking the words aloud at least helped my mind to deal with the heartache.
He looked to my covered arms when I spoke about the pain I had experienced and it wasn’t the type of attention that I wanted from him.
“What happened to you, Keira?” he asked me, making me frown and rub nervously at my arms out of awkward habit. But even if he was just a dream, it still wasn’t a story I ever wanted to tell him.
“That’s not something I share with anyone.”
“Yes, but I am not just anyone,” he told me, not with arrogance but more a certainty, as though it was his God-given right or something.
“No, you’re right because last night you made it perfectly clear that I am just that…a nobody to you.” Hearing this made him angry and he turned away from me again just as I saw his eyes start to turn purple the same way that they had done last night.
“That could never be true…you don’t know what you are saying,” he told me and finally I snapped.
“No? I only have your treatment of me to go by Draven, so how do you think I get these notions of disdain…? I will tell you how, if it isn’t your continued dismissal of me, or your blatant irritation or annoyance at having me around, it’s when you pretend to be nice to me for the sake of your sister’s demands!” I told him angrily. And this was when the dream took a different turn than I was used to.
He growled low in his throat as a purple darkness seeped into his eyes before spreading out, using his veins to travel around the rest of his body. He tensed as did I, when suddenly a massive shadow fell upon the room. A pair of great and mighty looking wings erupted from behind him like some dark Angel had just been set free from the cage of humanity he had kept it imprisoned in.
“Take that back, Keira!” he warned, grating out the demand in a demonic threat. I swallowed hard in fear for where my dreams had suddenly hit the realms of where nightmares were born. I scrambled back in my bed, as he came closer and I couldn’t understand what I was seeing. Why would I be seeing him this way and if so did this mean I would have to cast him from my mind too, like all the others? That thought was almost as scary as the sight before me now.
“Keira, I will not ask again,” he warned and I closed my eyes and shook my head, telling him no, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t take back how I felt. After all he had been the one to put those feelings there, driving that painful wedge into my heart so that only the one who inflicted the blow could take it back and save me.
I jumped when I felt his heated touch. I flinched back but he wouldn’t allow this and I screamed when I felt a hand circle my throat. It didn’t hurt but it was a serious enough move to make me open my eyes and look at him, which was what he wanted.
“Keira?! Are you alright?” I heard my sister’s voice from behind the door and Draven looked towards it, growling like some far-gone beast, snarling demonically.
He snapped out his hand and suddenly the door started to morph into a metal door that belonged on some ancient fortress. Strong metal rivets drove themselves deeper into the bars that appeared across the door. The panicked screams of my sister and frantic shouts from Frank started to increase and I watched open mouthed at what I was witnessing. Then suddenly Draven’s hand quickly made a fist and the fearful sounds of those I loved stopped and silence descended as the dark wave of power swept over them both.
“What did you do!” I demanded getting angry and hitting his chest in vain. He grabbed my wrists and pulled me towards him roughly.
“They sleep and will not be a part of your dreams any longer. Now you owe me something before I leave you for good.” I sucked back a sob and hated the way I still felt about the idea of him leaving me, even looking like this…I still couldn’t stand it!
“I will not take it back, not now, not ever!” I verbally spat at him trying to pull myself from his grasp on not just my arms but mainly on my heart.
“Then I will leave you,” he threatened and I let out a cry of defeat. It was the last thing I wanted and my head fell forward onto his chest. He released me and put a hand to the back of my head to hold me there as I cried. Long quiet moments later he spoke.
“I hate it when you cry,” he told me softly and I looked up at his purple gaze and said,
“And I hate it when you make me cry.” And that was it. We had once again come full circle.
“Just take it back and the pain will leave you…I promise,” he told me and I closed my eyes, releasing the last of my tears before saying quietly,
“You can’t ever promise that.”
“Just watch me,” he said sternly before lifting my head up to his with both hands at my cheeks before he kissed me. I felt his lips touch mine and I suddenly became lost in the darkness he had cast upon the room, giving me a guiding light from deep within. So, I gave him what he wanted. I pulled back enough to whisper over his lips,
“Then I take it back.”
After this his kiss grew in intensity and I realised that I was lost before and only now felt what it was like to be found in his arms…in his kiss…
In his heart.
I bolted upright and I was lost once again as his arms were no more.
His promise was gone.
And I was left cold and alone.
Chapter 25
I Call Bullshit.
Book 1
NEW
After that explosive dream, I felt strange. It was almost as if there had been some cosmic shift in my world that I didn’t yet know about. I just kept going back to that promise he had made and even though I knew it hadn’t been real, I just couldn’t seem to get past it. Even when I was getting ready for college and then again when in the car with RJ.
“Rough night?”
“Sorry?” I said jolting at the sound of another voice bringing me out of my inner turmoil. RJ laughed and said,
“I will take that as a yes.”
“I cut myself at work.” I told her holding up my hand and letting the cuff of my jacket fall back, showing her the bandage.
“Oh shit, so yeah, it must have been a rough night if you ended up in the ER,” RJ said looking at it and seeing it through her eyes then yes, it must have looked that way given how professionally it had been bandaged. I looked at it again, taking in the obvious precision in which it had been wrapped and I frowned thinking back to just twelve hours before.
“Actually, Draven did…” I was cut off when some other driver beeped their horn at RJ as she had stopped at a red light that had quickly turned green. The old car struggled to pull forward and RJ stuck her head out of the window, one we had to keep open to stop the windscreen from fogging up.
“IT’S AN OLD CAR, ASSHOLE!” she screamed at the other driver who just flipped her the bird in reply.
“What a douchebag, can you believe that guy?!” she said turning back to me as we plodded along in her dying VW. I just shook my head in a way that agreed with someone when they didn’t really have any feelings about it. After all, I was dealing with too much mental anguish to have anything left over for irate and impatient asshole drivers.